On this website you can find the classic symptoms of rejection, or what is clinically known as Avoidant Personality Disorder. You can check those out here. Today, I’m going to be talking about three symptoms of APD, rejection syndrome, root of rejection.
Unfortunately, I still struggle with these three. Not sure why. I think it’s ridiculous to feel this way about myself, but I guess at times, when I’m tired, or something hasn’t gone right, I lay into myself. #APD #rejection #self-worth Click to Tweet
Take last week for example. I talked about people disappointing me. I got a few more people disappointing me after that blog post went up, either not doing something I was hoping they would, or doing something I wish they wouldn’t. These aren’t serious offenses—it’s just that sometimes, I think, we get in our own little worlds. We think we have everything being put in place, only to have the rug pulled out from under us.
That makes a self-blamer. But that’s wrong, too. I shouldn’t take responsibility for things I don’t have control over. But that’s where the inadequacy, low self-esteem, and self-loathing come in. I put on my mental boxing gloves and start punching myself out. Ugh! Ick! Yuck! Argh!
Then, I get angry. Of course, anger fuels those three and the fight is on! I always win in the end, but sometimes it takes a few hours. Once the anger leaves, and peace enters, perspective comes. Click to Tweet Then I see just how ludicrous it was to even have fought that battle. I have to process the emotions. That’s the hard part. Processing the emotions without beating myself to a pulp. Only God helps me through it, but if I get mad at him (which I do), it may take me longer to win.
How about you? Do you have fisticuffs with yourself? Or cross swords? Leave a comment and let me know.